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How to Recognize and Help an Addict



It’s devastating to know a friend or a loved one suffers from an addiction. Before people get help, they often go down a long road of addiction prior to anyone, including themselves, noticing a problem. Consider the information and advice below if you know or suspect someone is an addict.

Your Gut

Addicts are excellent liars. It can seem disheartening to hear that you shouldn’t take them at face-value. However, listen to your gut. Your gut is telling you that something is wrong. Do not ignore this. They will tell you all the right things you’d like to hear. They will go into detail about where they were, why they did something and more. Everything will sound right to your mind. The very fact that you feel something isn’t right means more than likely something truly isn’t. Listen to what they say, and take notes because if they are addicts, they will slip up eventually. Don’t be the big-bad wolf that’s out to get them, but don’t be an enabler either. Enablers help them to stay stuck in their addiction by making excuses for them.


Addicts especially high-functioning addicts think that if they’re able to go to work, bring money home, do housework and other normal day-to-day life they do not have a problem with addiction. An addict is not just the junkie on the corner. Most addicts are high-functioning, which means they go under the radar for what passes as an addict to society. Because of this, and for reasons such as not wanting to face themselves, addicts will lie to themselves and the world. This is why most addicts are in denial. They might also reason that they don’t drink “enough” to be an addict. Make no mistake that alcoholism isn’t about the quantity of alcohol ingested. It’s about the mental obsession and physical craving of alcohol that makes someone an alcoholic. People who don’t drink for three of four months and suddenly “binge” can be alcoholics.

Things Don’t Add Up

It is often said that addicts lead double lives. This is true for anyone living in dysfunction. To the outside world, they have it together. Underneath that façade is a broken human being who uses alcohol, substances or anything else to get by. To make matters worse, this outward appearance can be further covered up, or justified, with a prescription medication. Abuse of a prescription medication is a serious concern. People often overdose on their pills or makeup excuses for why they need them even though they don’t have a legitimate need for them. This is why centers offer painkiller addiction treatment because it is a common phenomenon. It is also a growing phenomenon.

Real Help

To the addict, you’re “mean,” “unreasonable,” and a few choice words when you confront them. Expect this upfront. It’s not a reflection of who you are as a person despite their best attempts to assassinate your character. What they say about you has everything to do with their dysfunction. More often than not, they will choose their addiction over you. Real help and real love mean saying, “I’m going to tell you the truth,” “I need to love myself before I can love you,” or “I don’t accept your excuse. You’re responsible for your behavior, and I refuse to be a part of your life until you take responsibility for yourself.”

You can’t force someone to get help, but you can stop enabling them. Don’t make excuses for their behaviors or addiction. Addicts have to want to get help before they do. Once you know there is a problem, stand your ground. Speak truthfully to the addict. Above all, love yourself because this has been and will continue to be incredibly hard on you. Understand that they have to learn to love themselves too.

Elliot Caleira is a freelance writer in the self-mastery in health and wellness spaces. When he's not writing you'll find him cooking or teaching Portuguese classes.

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Study Suggests Why Food Assistance for Homeless Young Adults is Inadequate



Though young homeless adults make use of available food programs, these support structures still often fail to provide reliable and consistent access to nutritious food, according to the results of a new study by a University at Buffalo social work researcher.

The findings, which fill an important gap in the research literature, can help refine policies and programs to better serve people experiencing homelessness, particularly those between the ages of 18-24.

“It may be tempting to think of food pantries, soup kitchens and the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) as the solution,” says Elizabeth Bowen, an assistant professor in UB’s School of Social Work and lead author of the study with Andrew Irish, a UB graduate student in the School of Social Work, published in the journal Public Health Nutrition. But these supports are not enough. “We’re still seeing high levels of food insecurity, literal hunger, where people go a whole day without eating anything.”

The U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) defines food insecurity as “multiple indications of disrupted eating patterns and reduced food intake.” Hunger is a “potential consequence of food insecurity [that] results in discomfort, illness, weakness or pain.” In Bowen’s study, 80 percent of participants were considered to be severely food insecure.

“There has been recent research about housing and shelter use for homeless young adults, as well as work on drug use and sexual risk behaviors for this same population, but I found that not much had been done on the issue of food access,” says Bowen. “It’s hard to even think about housing and health needs if we don’t know how people are eating, or not eating.”

It’s not surprising see a relationship between homelessness and food insecurity, but Bowen warns of oversimplifying what is in fact a more nuanced problem.

“This research is important because we’re establishing a clear indication of food insecurity in this population, which we did not previously have,” she says. “If we’re going to design programs and services that better address food insecurity, along with addressing housing, education and employment, we need to know about the access strategies: How and what are homeless young adults eating? Where are they finding food? What do they have to do to get it? And how does that affect other parts of their lives?”

For her qualitative study, Bowen conducted in-depth interviews with 30 young adults between the ages of 18-24 who were experiencing homelessness in Buffalo, New York.

“Working with this small group gives us insights into the lived experience,” says Bowen. “It’s a way of setting a knowledge foundation and understanding of the topic in the context of people’s lives, and what goes on with their health, housing, relationships, education and trying to get out of homelessness.”

In Bowen’s study, 70 percent of young adults were receiving SNAP benefits, also known as food stamps. But actually getting these benefits can be difficult.

SNAP covers dependent children under their parent’s benefits until the child’s 22nd birthday. But the program administers benefits based on the parents’ address and assumes that parents and children of a single family are living together.

“This is clearly a problem for young people experiencing homelessness since many of them are under 22 and obviously aren’t living at the same address as their parents,” says Bowen. “The young people in this case can’t get SNAP on their own because they’re already listed on their parents’ open application for those same benefits – and the burden of proof is on the young person to demonstrate they don’t live with their parents.”

Documentation is required as proof that the family is no longer together, according to Bowen, but in many cases getting the necessary paperwork is difficult because of strained family relationships.

“That’s one avenue for a policy change,” says Bowen.

But even with revised eligibility guidelines, food stamps sometimes are not enough, particularly for homeless young people who have no way to store or prepare food. Bowen notes that this problem would be greatly exacerbated by a change proposed in the 2019 federal budget to convert part of a household’s SNAP benefits from electronic benefits to a box of canned goods and other commodities.

Homeless young adults’ food access challenges are further compounded by the fact that young people are sometimes reluctant to use resources like soup kitchens, or have trouble accessing these places due to transportation barriers and limited hours. This finding mirrors prior research showing how young adults are not comfortable in places meant for the general homeless adult population, according to Bowen.

For instance, where shelter is concerned, an 18-year-old in the city of Buffalo is considered an adult and would go to an adult shelter, which can feel discouraging and unsafe.

“What I found in this study is that people were saying the same things about places to get food. They know about these soup kitchens, but the places feel institutional and stigmatized to young people,” says Bowen. “If we want to develop food programs to be engaging to young people we have to think about breaking down some barriers. For example, because of food insecurity among students, many college campuses are now offering food pantries. I would like to think about how to integrate food pantries and other services into places where young people are going anyway.”

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Veterans: Take This Survey!



Learning about military-to-civilian reintegration requires asking the right questions of the right people. A novel, new study is seeking military veteran respondents to learn more about the way service impacts health, civic engagement, and socio-economic outcomes for military-connected men and women. The data collected through this survey are expected to help us answer questions such as:

• Do veterans feel welcome and interested in institutional service groups like the VA and informal groups like VSOs? Do those organizations serve their needs? How are prospective members welcomed and served?
• How does military service impact community involvement and political engagement?
• How does military service impact experiences on the job market (and is this effect conditioned by demographic factors?
• Does military service break the glass ceiling for service women?

The project was developed by an interdisciplinary research team with experience, training, and connections to the military community. Dr. Kyleanne Hunter is a Marine Corps Cobra pilot and political science researcher. Dr. Rebecca Best is an experienced security studies researcher with a focus on service women. Dr. Kate Hendricks Thomas is a public health researcher and Marine Corps veteran. Each has specific training in community-based, participatory research and is invested in filling current gaps in what we think we know about the transition from service member to civilian.

Access the survey online here:

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Lower Blood Sugar Levels with These 7 Superfoods



Being cautious about your health doesn’t have to be a dull and agonizing check off your to-do list. You can make it fun by trying new foods and recipes throughout the week. It’s not hard to cover all the basics, especially if you eat a variety of colors and flavors every day.

Lowering and stabilizing your blood sugar is an essential demand when you want to prevent diabetes from occurring or progressing. Add these seven superfoods to your meals, (or eat them as a snack through the week) and watch the level of your health transform with ease.

1. Sweet Potatoes

This rooted superfood is an excellent choice as a main dish, side dish and even a snack on a lazy day. They are packed with fiber, have a low glycemic index, and are easy to cook. The best way to prepare a sweet potato is to roast/bake it in the oven. They go great paired with leafy greens or even just topped with a dash of cinnamon (which is also a superfood).

2. Turmeric

Another rooted superfood is Turmeric. You might have heard of this spice when visiting restaurants with Caribbean or Indian cuisine. It’s said to have the best medicinal history of preventing disease and illness in many cultures around the world. Curcumin, the active ingredient in Turmeric, can prevent inflammation and the activation of cancerous cells.

3. Blueberries

Wild blueberries are one of the best power fruits to hit the list. Not only are they packed with soluble fiber, but they also offer a good source of insoluble fiber. Having both of these properties allows this superfood to flush out your system which, in turn, improves your blood sugar levels. Anthocyanins are one of the specific types of antioxidants found in blueberries giving them their vibrant blue color. You can find blueberries at your local grocery store and farmer’s market just about all year-round depending on where you live. Freeze them for smoothies, eat them for a snack, or add them to muffins and pancakes for breakfast.

4. Oats

Organic oats are another easy meal you can whip up to reduce your risk of diabetes. Oats pack large amounts of magnesium and fiber. These two components help the body produce insulin and adequately regulate your blood pressure. Oats are super versatile to cook with and easy to make on any day, making them fit well into any schedule. You can boil them for breakfast and add fruit, or add them to muffin and cookie mix. Surprisingly, there are recipes that use oats as an alternative to using flour.

5. Kale

While making dietary plans to lower your blood sugar, you should highly consider adding kale to your grocery list. This super leafy green is one of the best non-starchy vegetables available. It’s super nutrients build up your immune system, burn fat, and regulate blood pressure. It’s easy to add to a salad, eat with fresh fruit, or throw in your smoothie for breakfast.

6. Avocado

Another versatile food to eat is the heart-healthy avocado! It offers the right amount of fats, improves cholesterol levels, and has enough carbs to keep you feeling full. You may think it’s a vegetable, but it’s technically a fruit. It goes great paired with strawberries or as a topper for toast. Cooking with avocado is a breeze. Plan to make pasta, guacamole, salads, and sandwiches with it. The only downfall to eating avocado is the painful wait for them to ripen. Worry not – placing avocados in a brown paper bag can speed up the process.

7. Cranberries

Last, but not least, on our superfoods list is the bold and bright cranberry. Most people only know about cranberries when it comes to holiday dinners, but there are other ways to indulge in this power-packed fruit. Since cranberries have high antioxidant levels, they reduce cholesterol and lower blood pressure.

Much like the other foods listed, you can have this in salads, smoothies, or by themselves for a snack. The best part? You never have to feel guilty about munching on these tangy treats.

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Common STIs and How To Avoid Contracting Them



Every year, an estimated 20 million adults in the USA contract some type of STI. While some STIs exhibit distinct symptoms, others might be completely unnoticeable. Whether they’re asymptomatic or not, any sexually active person will still need to be vigilant and informed when it comes to preventing the spread of STIs. With convenient, discreet, and affordable STD testing much more commonplace today, there’s no excuse for anyone to avoid taking charge of their own health and protecting others as well. Here are some of the most common diseases and how you can avoid contracting them.

HPV – Genital Human Papillomavirus

In the United States, about 14 million people get HPV every year, making it the most common STI. It’s so common that almost every sexually active person will contract it in their lifetime. There are over 40 different strains of HPV. Some strains can cause warts, while others can lead to cancer if left untreated.

HPV is spread by having oral, vaginal, or anal sex with someone who has the virus. With most strains of this virus, you may not experience any symptoms and it may go away on its own. However, if it doesn’t go away, then it can cause problems.

Sometimes, HPV can cause genital warts. These warts can vary in size or shape. So, it’s recommended that you consult your doctor examine you if you notice anything that could be a genital wart. Some strains of HPV can cause cancer. It can take years, even decades, to contract cancer after getting the virus. You could get vaginal, anal, throat, tongue, penis, vulva, or tonsil cancer.

The CDC recommends that you get the HPV vaccine. Many people get this vaccine around 12 years old, but you can get it up until you’re 26 years old.


This STI is a bacterial infection. You can contract chlamydia by oral, vaginal, or anal sex with someone who has it. Additionally, a pregnant person could pass the infection onto their newborn. Symptoms of this STI include:

  • Unusual discharge from a penis or vagina
  • Burning sensation during urination

Your doctor can provide tests to determine if you have chlamydia. If you do, you can treat it using antibiotics. It’s recommended that you get treatment as soon as possible as chlamydia can cause fertility problems in both genders.


An estimated 800,000 people deal with this STI every year. Gonorrhea occurs when bacteria infects the lining of a woman’s reproductive tract. It can also manifest in the mouth, throat, eyes, and anus. You can contract this infection by having oral, vaginal, or anal sex with an infected person.

With this infection, you may face no symptoms at all. If you do have symptoms, you may experience unusual discharge from your genitals and pain while urinating. Men may experience pain in their testicles, while women may experience vaginal bleeding in between periods.

After diagnosis, you may be treated with two, different strains of antibiotics. Like Chlamydia, if it’s left untreated you may experience fertility issues in the future.

Genital Herpes

Unlike most STIs, there is no cure for genital herpes. Each year, around 800,000 adults contract the disease nationwide. This infection is caused by the herpes simplex virus or HSV. There are two strains of this virus – type 1 and type 2 and you can be infected by having any type of sexual contact with someone who carries the disease.

While some people experience mild symptoms, others are completely asymptomatic. Symptoms include having blisters around the mouth, anus, or genitals. These blisters will break open, causing pain and discomfort. The fluid inside of the blisters carry the herpes virus.

While it cannot be cured, your doctor can prescribe medicine to ease your pain.

How To Avoid STIs

There are multiple things you can do to prevent getting STIs. First and foremost, you need to ask your sexual partners to disclose their sexual history before you have sex with them. This lets you know if they’ve had any STIs and how many partners they’ve had intercourse with. Additionally, you can ask your partners to get tested for any STIs before you have sex with them.

Whenever you have sex, you should be using latex condoms. Using a condom every time you have sex can vastly reduce your chance of contracting an STI. The CDC has many tips on preventing STIs.

I Have an STI – What Now?

If you do contract an STI, go to your doctor’s office as soon as possible. If you can’t afford to go to the doctor’s, there are many places that offer STD testing.  It’s important to get tested so that you can protect yourself from having health problems down the road.

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Child Welfare

Parental Medicaid Expansion Translates into Preventive Care for their Children



When low-income parents enroll in Medicaid through the Affordable Care Act (ACA) state expansion program, their children have considerably better odds of receiving annual preventive care pediatrician visits, according to a new analysis by the University of Pittsburgh Graduate School of Public Health and Johns Hopkins University.

This “spillover effect,” explained in a study published online today and scheduled for the December issue of the journal Pediatrics, demonstrates that the potential benefits of Medicaid expansion extend beyond the newly covered adults.

“These findings are of great significance given the current uncertainty surrounding the future of the ACA and Medicaid expansions authorized by the law,” said senior author Eric T. Roberts, Ph.D., assistant professor in Pitt Public Health’s Department of Health Policy and Management. “Lawmakers crafting policy proposals that could curtail Medicaid benefits or eligibility should recognize that such efforts would not just limit the receipt of health care services by low-income adults, but also by their children.”

The ACA provided states the opportunity to expand Medicaid coverage to all low-income people at or below 138 percent of the federal poverty level. So far, 31 states and the District of Columbia have expanded Medicaid coverage.

Roberts and his colleagues identified 50,622 parent-child pairs from data collected in the 2001 through 2013 Medical Expenditure Panel Surveys, a nationally representative survey administered by the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services that includes detailed information on family structure and demographics, including health insurance status and health care use.

They discovered that children of parents who had recently enrolled in Medicaid had a 29 percent higher probability than children of unenrolled parents of receiving their well child visit, which is recommended annually for children age 3 and older, and more frequently for infants and toddlers.

During the visits, the children are examined for growth and development and given immunizations, and their caregivers are guided on proper nutrition and child behaviors. Studies have shown that children who get well child visits are more likely to receive all their immunizations and less likely to have avoidable hospitalizations. The U.S. has persistently low rates of well child visits, particularly in low-income families.

“There are many reasons that parental Medicaid coverage increases the likelihood of well child visits for their children,” said Roberts. “It could be that insurance enhances the parents’ ability to navigate the health care system for themselves and their children, increasing their comfort in scheduling well child visits. Medicaid enrollment could be a sort of ‘welcome mat,’ in which eligible but previously uninsured children are enrolled after their parents gain coverage. It also could be that parental Medicaid coverage frees up more money to provide preventive services to their children, because even copays can be a deterrent to medical care among low-income people.”

Maya Venkataramani, M.D., is lead author on this research, and Craig Evan Pollack, M.D., M.H.S., is a coauthor. Both are from the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine.

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How to Develop an Individual Grief Plan



Story’s Angel of Grief

My Mother always said that my Daddy was “a fool born on April fools”. This was the running joke all of my life.  April 1 came along this year and it was not a joking matter. I was heartbroken and devastated that I could not hear my father’s voice or see his smiling face on his birthday.

Earl, My Pearl, was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer June 20, 2016, after suffering several months of abdominal pain, significant weight loss and limited mobility. He passed away peacefully on September 9, 2016, 4:30 am. This process was very difficult for all of us to watch, yet, we were there every step of the way and handled it a gracefully as possible.

I worked as a hospice social worker for several years prior to my father’s diagnosis. Our journey was still difficult but I was familiar with the language and processes pertaining to the end of life which afforded me the opportunity to assist my mother in talking with our team of doctors and making decisions. She found comfort and security in that and this made me proud. I saw this as an attempt to make this living nightmare a little less scary and slightly bearable.

My hospice experience also somewhat prepared me for being around death. I spent time with my Daddy after he passed away and I combed his hair prior to his wake with an unusual calm.  These were tender moments that I will forever cherish.

I faced a dilemma as my Daddy’s birthday approached. My 8th wedding anniversary was a few days prior to Daddy’s birthday.  My husband wanted us to go away to celebrate the weekend of April 1st.  My plan had been to spend the morning at the cemetery with my mother.

After discussing it with my spouse and my mother (my voices of reason) I came to the conclusion that my father would not want me weeping at his grave on his birthday. He would prefer me to go away, live life and celebrate with my husband whom he was very proud of and admired. So, we continued with our anniversary plans although I did not know what April 1st was going to be like.

I was committed to getting through my Daddy’s first birthday in Heaven without ruining this special weekend that my husband had so thoughtfully planned.  So, I allotted uninterrupted time and space for my grief and I planned activities to pull me out of those dark places that have the ability to consume us if allowed.  I planned for my grief.  Sound weird; keep reading.  I hope my experience assists you in your process.

On the morning of April 1st, I woke up, attempted to post a memorial birthday wish to My Pearl on my Facebook page and the tears began.  I went into the bathroom and cried hard for at least an hour if not more.  I wasn’t simply misty eyed or a little teary; this was the ugly cry that people try not to do in public.

My husband tried to console me but I asked him to allow me to handle this on my own.  I allowed the tears and emotions to flow without beating myself up for crying like a 37-year-old baby.  I did not attempt to suppress my feelings which is typically our natural response.  I went through the sadness of being Daddy’s little girl without her Daddy.  I experienced the “maybe I could have done more” routine that we wallow in sometimes.  I felt the guilt of not choosing to be graveside on his 75th birthday.

I felt horrible for abandoning my mother in her grief even though I knew she wanted me to continue with my celebration.  It went on and on and I allowed it until it ran its course naturally. Once I was completely done, I sat in silence for a while then cleaned myself up.  I felt weak, somewhat limp yet refreshed. My husband and I went to a lovely breakfast at our hotel; we changed our clothes and went to the gym together.

After that, I took a long hot shower, allowed myself to air dry across the crisp white comforter on our king size fluffy bed.  I then turned on some relaxing beautiful music.  I did not sleep, I simply allowed myself to be in total and complete relaxation for the remainder of the afternoon.  Our friends met us for cocktails and a show and it turned out to be an amazing and wonderful trip overall.  I planned for my grief, I executed and came through my Daddy’s first birthday relatively unscathed and empowered.

Make an appointment to grieve.

When we go to the doctor, we have an appointment.  You have called ahead, maybe weeks in advance, to make the appointment.  You have your appointment time, you see the doctor to discuss your health, meds, etc within your allotted amount of time (usually not over an hour) you say your goodbyes and you leave.  Think of your grief in that way.

I set my grief appointment for first thing in the morning because we were on vacation. We had nothing pressing planned that morning and we had guests meeting us in the evening. Whatever your day is going to look like, carve out space and time to be alone with your grief and make it happen.

This is important because if you allow the grief to have its way, it will show up throughout the day and consume you for the better part of that day and possibly beyond.  Take control of your grief by making an appointment, letting it present as it may, then, as you do with other appointments, say your goodbyes and leave it.

Don’t take “walk-ins”.

It is very difficult to walk into your doctor’s office and see them without an appointment. Apply this to your grief.  Say you had your appointment, you successfully followed all of the steps and are moving on with your day.  If grief shows up outside of its appointment time, turn it away:  “Look grief, your appointment was 8 am. We saw you and dealt with you then.  I will see you at your next scheduled appointment.” Acknowledge your grief but do not allow it to consume you outside of your appointment.  Commit to having power and control over the grief.

Plan to grieve alone.

Our family members and close friends mean well in trying to assist us in our grief, especially around holidays and special events that we would normally share with our deceased loved one.  Unintentionally, they can often be a hindrance, sometimes a crutch in our process. Additionally, we may subconsciously modify our grief in order to accommodate them and their level of comfort.

This appointment is not the time for such modifications.  Maybe we will cry but suck it up and move forward prematurely because they might feel like we have cried long enough.  Or maybe they, meaning well, will say the cliché things that people say when one is grieving in an effort to help ease the pain and stop the flow of tears:  “it will be ok” or “time heals all wounds” and my all-time favorite “he’s in a better place”.  We know that those things are true.

However, do we want to hear those things in our time of grief?  NO!!!  We are thinking “it won’t be ok because I can’t live without him”, “nothing will heal these wounds” and “the best place is here with me”.  None of those clichés are needed or welcomed for that matter, at this point in the process.  Again, you have to allow space and time for this process without guidance from well-meaning family members and friends.   It has to run its own natural course.  Friends and family have a more appropriate role in the next steps of this process.

Plan activities that you enjoy.

I knew that if I had grieved and simply remained still, I would have wallowed in a sad, hurtful place all day.  Therefore, I moved on to an enjoyable breakfast then a workout with my husband to take my mind to better places.  It’s not that you’re getting busy to suppress your feelings. Because of your grief appointment, you have dealt with your feelings and emotions head on and very appropriately.

You’re merely creating a beautiful welcomed distraction in order to move on with your day.  After the grief appointment, it is imperative to get up and get busy living.  This has to be planned for and executed.  At this point, your family and social support system could play a huge, meaningful role without hindering your process.  Remember, do not take walk-ins!

Take some time for relaxation and self-care.

My self-care was a long hot shower followed by resting to nice music.  Your self-care may look like a spa day, a long jog through your favorite park, a scenic hike, cooking an elaborate meal or a shopping trip.  Whatever makes you feel well, do it!  Think of this as a special gift from your loved one on this special day; it’s your reward for bravely facing your grief and taking control of your grief process.  I firmly believe that the ones that we loved and lost enjoy seeing us live happy and well despite their absence.

Be Grateful.

My father was here for all of my major life events: all of my graduations and performances, he moved me into my first apartment, he walked me down the aisle at my wedding, he was there during my pregnancy and formed a sweet relationship with my daughter…with all of that being said, how can I wallow in sadness?  I am so grateful for having a father that was present until he passed away.

Others have not been as fortunate and I acknowledge that. For that reason, I choose on his birthday, holidays and any day of the week to be grateful for him and his life rather than focus on his absence.  I am also grateful that he did not suffer long after his diagnosis.

As a hospice social worker, I saw patients and families suffer months and months; having their hopes of recovery dashed with the horrible news that their cancer had spread and there were no further options.  This was not our case.  We had our ups and downs but God was merciful and ended my father’s battle 3 months after he was diagnosed.  For that I am grateful. My gratitude list could go on and on.  My point is that in our sadness and on those birthdays and holidays, we have to immerse ourselves in gratitude in order to make it through.

The preceding technique is not the catch all or fix all for your grief issues around holidays and special occasions. This is merely a formula that worked for me and I was compelled to share it with the hopes of helping others.  If you are experiencing complicated, ongoing grief issues, please, seek help from a mental health professional.

Individual sessions, grief support groups, and other therapeutic interventions to deal with grief may be necessary depending on your individual needs.  Remember, death is inevitable for all of us.  However, being proactive in our grief process and planning for the same may assist and make facing holidays without your loved one bearable and beautiful.  It happened for me; that’s my hope for you!

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